Marvel Crack Meme

Found this funny meme through a hilarious piece of Resident Evil fanart from Chrystalis . Here is the pic that spawned it all: chrystalis.deviantart.com/art/…

Anyway! I decided to answer the same questions with characters from Marvel. Prepare for crack!

Here goes...

First, write down the names of 12 characters of your choice. Then read and answer the questions. You can't look at the questions until you write down the 12 characters you're going to use. Otherwise where would the fun be?

1) Thor

2) Steve Rogers

3) Bruce Banner

4) Tony Stark

5) Hulk

6) Black Widow

7) Hawkeye

8) Deadpool

9) Ms Marvel

10) Peter Parker

11) Loki

12) Matt Murdock

Have you ever read a six (Black Widow)/Eleven (Loki) fic? Do you want to?

Yes, actually. Loki made himself look like Hawkeye to comfort a dying Natasha. It was saaaad.

Do you think 4 (Tony Stark) is hot? How hot?

Who doesn't think Tony Stark is hot? In all seriousness, his EMH self is drawn too pretty too ignore.

What would happen if Twelve (Matt Murdock) got Eight (Deadpool) pregnant?

People would have serious questions about HOW.

Can you read any fic(s) about Nine (Ms Marvel)?

I have yet to read any Ms Marvel fics, but I know they exist.

Would Two (Steve Rogers) and Six (Black Widow) be a good couple?

Well, depends on if you've seen the new Captain America movie or not. They had some pretty good chemistry there, but in general I don't like to pair them up. Natasha works so well with Hawkeye.

Five (Hulk)/Nine (Ms Marvel) or Five (Hulk)/Ten (Peter Parker).

Uhh...I'm drawing a blank, here. Neither? I guess I'll pick Peter. He makes Hulk laugh.

What would happen if Seven (Hawkeye) walked in on Two (Steve Rogers) and Twelve (Matt Murdock) in bed together?

Hawkeye would probably escape into the air vents. That's my best bet.

Make up a summary for a Three (Bruce Banner)/Ten (Peter Parker) fic.

Errr. Bruce tutors Peter about the radiation side of science for college. Our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man develops a little crush on teacher, especially after he realizes Bruce has it even worse than him in the “thankless job” department. At least the government isn't intent on hunting Spidey down!

Is there any such thing as One (Thor)/Eight (Deadpool) fluff?

If it involves Deadpool, it exists somewhere. Especially since he finds Thor to be gorgeous, and says so in the comics.

Suggest a title for a Seven (Hawkeye)/Twelve (Matt Murdock) hurt/comfort fic.

Cupid in the Devil's Arms ( Oh, dear.)

What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted Four (Tony Stark) to deflower One (Thor)?

That would have to involve time travel, because I'm pretty sure Thor's slept with plenty of people in his immortal existence. XD

Does anyone on your friends list read Seven (Hawkeye) slash?

Yes indeedy-do. Some draw it, too.

Does anyone on your friends list read Three (Bruce Banner) slash?

Actually, he's the one they're pairing with Hawkeye. XD

Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven (Loki)?

Sometimes I wonder if anybody HASN'T written or drawn Loki. His fanbase is a mighty one, burdened with glorious rabid obsessiveness.

Would anyone on your friends list write Two (Steve Rogers)/Four (Tony Stark)/Five (Hulk)?

Probably not in that exact combination, no. Thanks to the whole Science Bros thing, there are heaps of people who would be happy to pair Tony with Hulk, though, as weird as that sounds. Oo

What might Ten (Peter Parker) scream at a moment of great passion?

Probably some sort of “thinking aloud” dialogue to himself.

If you wrote a song-fic about Eight (Deadpool), which song would you choose?

Oh man, there are so many options here. XD I'd choose “Shut Me Up” by Mindless Self Indulgence. I imagine it more as an AMV than a songfic, though, since I haven't written songfics since I was a 15-year-old writing silly Gundam Wing angst.

If you wrote a One (Thor)/Six (Black Widow)/Twelve (Matt Murdock) fic, what would the warnings be?

Warning: Angsty love triangles may sort themselves out into three-way polyamory.

What might be a good pick-up line for Two (Steve Rogers) to use on Ten (Peter Parker)?

I like Superfamily, so I think of Cap as more fatherly toward Peter. In a non-Superfamily story, I'd imagine Cap could get his attention by saying just about anything—Spidey hero-worships him. A lot of the other heroes do.

When was the last time you read a fic about Five (Hulk)?

Last month when I re-read “Every Thirty Days.”

What is Six's (Black Widow) super-secret kink?

Roleplaying.

Would Eleven (Loki) get in bed with Nine (Ms Marvel)? Drunk or sober?

If it furthered some sneaky plan of his, I'm sure he would. I'll say drunk, because drunk!Loki would probably cause all sorts of trouble with his illusion powers while not thinking straight.

If Three (Bruce Banner) and Seven (Hawkeye) get together, who tops?

Movie fans will say Bruce. Cartoon fans will say Hawkeye. People who are not fans of slash will go

Fill in the numbers of this sentence with the names:

"1. (Thor) and 9. (Peter Parker) are in a happy relationship until 9. (Peter) suddenly runs off with 4. (Tony Stark). 1. (Thor), broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with 11. (Loki) and a brief unhappy affair with 12. (Matt Murdock), then follows the wise advice of 5. (Hulk) and finds true love with 3. (Bruce Banner)."

Sorry, Matt, it seems like most of your romantic attempts end in unhappiness. Meanwhile, Bruce needs no wingman—Hulk's got his back.

What title would you give this fic?

“Love Gets the Hammer”

Name three people on your friends list who might read it.

I will not name names...but Marvel fans would enjoy such crack. XD

Name one person who should write it.

If anybody actually wrote it, it would probably be me.

How would you feel if Seven (Hawkeye)/ Eight (Deadpool) was canon?

It's Deadpool, anything can be canon with Deadpool—even if it's only happening inside his head.

Annnnd there we have it. I love memes like this. So many crackish ideas.